Hey there, mommas, dadas, grannies, and loving people!
I recently had an eye-opening experience while caring for my dear niece. At two years old, she's eager to learn, but like many toddlers, she has encountered a common stumbling block: pull-ups.
Pull-ups may seem like a step toward independence, but they're still diapers. They're designed to keep kids dry and comfortable, just like diapers, with the only difference being that you can pull them up or down. However, this can create confusion for toddlers.
When kids wear pull-ups, they don't feel the wetness when they pee, which can undermine the whole potty training process. Why stop playing to use the toilet if they don't feel wet? It's a logical conclusion for a child to make and how they often act.
One crucial aspect of potty training is teaching/guiding kids to recognize the feeling of needing to go, realize what happens if they do not go, and decide to use the toilet. But if they're wearing pull-ups, they miss out on this crucial learning opportunity.
What you need to do:
1- Making the decision: Embarking on the journey of potty training can be a daunting decision for families. There's often a cloud of anxiety hovering over the topic, with uncertainty looming about when and how to begin. Dr. Becky from Good Inside aptly refers to it as "Potty Learning," a term that deeply resonates with us.
Regardless of where you fall on the anxiety scale, it's essential to remember that this phase is just one of many learning experiences your child will navigate. Yes, mastering the art of using the potty may seem like a monumental task, but, it's just one of the many challenges they'll conquer along the way. And as a parent, you'll undoubtedly find yourself cleaning up messes that go beyond just baby poop.
2- Avoid chaos: Educating yourself and your family is crucial, not just for potty training but for every new phase your child will encounter. Reading books, engaging in conversations with other parents, and exploring different perspectives can provide valuable insights and strategies that resonate with your parenting style.
As a parent, it's essential to recognize that this journey is one of the most important tasks we undertake. While there's no mandatory preparation manual for parenthood, taking the initiative to educate ourselves can make the difference. Here are two of my favorite resources that have proven invaluable during my own journey of potty training and child development.
“Oh Crap! Potty Training”: This is the book that most clearly state for me the path to potty training. I did not take everything but it was a great guide to minimize chaos. There it is the Audiobook option that I found very funny and easy to digest.
Potty Program from Good Inside:: Dr. Becky is offering her Potty Program for free. Some of the approach she share resonates with me.
Full disclosure: I am not affiliated with or receiving any compensation for sharing this information. These resources have personally helped me navigate the challenges of parenting, and I hope they prove beneficial to you as well.
3- Commit to guiding your child: If you invest the time to guide your child, I promise you, you will see results. Not in one day, not in three either, but sooner than you think, your child will be holding it to play a few minutes more before using the toilet, and that means that instead of peeing every 5 min, your child is learning to consolidate before using the toilet! And that is great news!
Now, I'm not against pull-ups altogether. They can be a lifesaver when you're out and about and don't want to risk accidents in the car or elsewhere. But when you're at home in a safe environment and during those blocks of time scheduled to guide your child on potty training, it's best to ditch the pull-ups and stick to underwear or even let them go commando for a while.
Have you ever thought about the time and effort we invest in guiding our children as they learn and grow? Take feeding, for example. From around six months old, we spend months feeding our little ones, patiently sitting them several times per day at the table or in the high chair, showing them how to hold a spoon and bring food to their mouths, and gradually transitioning them to self-feeding. It's not something that happens overnight; it's a process that unfolds over time with our consistent, guided routine.
The same holds true for other milestones, like learning to walk. It takes months of holding their hands, encouraging them to take small steps, and providing a supportive environment to develop their balance and coordination. Each day, we guide them through the process, knowing that it's not about expecting them to magically understand or achieve these milestones on their own. Our role in creating this supportive environment is crucial and a testament to our dedication and love.
Potty training is the same. We need to be present, patient, and consistent in our guidance. Remember, the goal of potty training isn't for kids to magically remove their diapers and start using the toilet on their own. It's a gradual process that requires loving guidance, patience, more loving guidance, and consistency. So, let's skip the pull-ups and focus on helping our little ones understand their bodies and learn to use the toilet.
Happy potty training!
Eliana
